It's been two weeks, how are you doing on those New Year's resolutions? Do you find yourself losing determination? Lacking the motivation to carry out what you felt so strongly about just fourteen days ago? Or perhaps you are doing AWESOME because you didn't even make resolutions!
Lots of people choose not to make New Year's resolutions, they don't believe in them. Resolutions are seen as a waste of time and effort because the majority of them fail. Supposedly, a mere 8% of people successfully achieve their resolution (1). So then, if you can't keep it, why make it, right? Some are even suggesting that New Year's resolutions are
bad for you because they damage your self-worth:
"If your New Year’s resolution is to eat less, but you have no plan in place — or even if you do have a plan and you fail — you will do damage to your sense of self-worth. If you already have a complicated relationship with food, your likely coping mechanism for failure is eating more food. Thus the New Year’s resolution to eat less can actually result in your eating more. " Jessica Lamb-Shapiro
It is true, nothing magical happens from December 31 to January 1, you are still the same person and because of this many people struggle. New Year's resolutions often fail because the changes desired are too abrupt, or too large (2). You start off the new year strong but as time passes your resolve weakens and soon you've failed. Due to this you may think you are weak, lacking in self-control. Next time, if you just try harder, if you just have more will power then you won't fail. After all, "where there's a will there's a way"...or is there?
In her book, Idols of the Heart Learning to Long for God Alone, Elyse Fitzpatrick addresses the topic of our wills and why our actions fail to meet our words.
"The difference between what we say and what we do is not because of our wills per se. Our wills are functioning the way they were meant to. The contradiction is between our words and our strongest desires. Our wills follow after the erroneous thoughts and sinful desires we delight in."
Our will is not broken. Quite the opposite is true, it is working in top notch condition choosing our strongest thoughts and desires. In fact, our will
reveals what we believe will bring us the most happiness. It shows us what is going on in our mind (thoughts and beliefs) and in our heart (longings and desires).
"As you see, the problem is not that we need to develop more willpower. The problem is that we need new thoughts, new inclinations, and new desires. We don't need to learn how to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps or "gut it out." We need to seek to replace our sinful passions with holy ones. When God grants these new holy passions to us, we'll find that our will, which seemed so weak before, will joyfully comply." Elyse Fitzpatrick
Trying harder is not the solution to achieving your New Year's resolutions. It's not about fixing your will; its about fixing your beliefs, your affections, your mind. When your thinking changes your choices will change. This is what Paul discusses in Romans. He said, "Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds set on what that nature desires; but those who live in accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires" (Romans 8:5). He goes on to say, "Do not be conformed any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is" (Romans 12:2). Living out the Spirit's desires, God's will, requires that the mind is renewed.
So how do we go about renewing our mind and changing our desires? I mean, it seems impossible that I could stop desiring chocolate. Well, Psalm 1 says a man does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, or stand in the way of sinners, or sit in the seat of mockers,
because he delights in the law of the Lord and he meditates on it day and night. Psalm 119:11 says "I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you." It seems that what we fill our mind with will shape what we believe and desire. This is why we are encouraged to "take captive every thought" (2 Corinthians 10:5) and replace it with what is true, nobel, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, and praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8). It is truth that will set us free (John 8:32), renewing our mind and desires, to change our behavior.
Personally, I like New Year's resolutions. I think we are naturally wired for beginnings. There is a beginning every day with a sunrise, a beginning in all of the Mondays we dread, and after winter a thousand beginnings as the earth awakens. As Christians, we had a new beginning in Christ, the old life was gone and the new had come (2 Corinthians 5:17). Some day we will even have a new heaven and a new earth (Isaiah 65:17). Beginnings bring hope, thus its good for us to begin again each year with resolutions. After all, "if you aim at nothing you are sure to hit it."
With the first couple weeks of the year behind us, its only going to get more difficult to keep our resolutions. The majority of us will probably experience failure to some extent, but before we think, "If I just try harder..." or blame our will power, lets ask ourselves what we are thinking. What have we been filling our mind with lately?
Resources:
1. http://www.statisticbrain.com/new-years-resolution-statistics/
2. http://www.healthline.com/health-news/fitness-why-most-new-years-resolutions-fail-010214
3. Idols of the Heart Learning to Long for God Alone, Elyse Fitzpatrick
4. http://www.desiringgod.org/sermons/the-renewed-mind-and-how-to-have-it
5. http://www.khouse.org/articles/1996/277/
6. http://www.khouse.org/articles/1996/278/
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